Swallow This

What seems a staple and forced diet for Americans and, now, the rest of the world with I Won's Cairo speech is a table filled with myth rather than gospel. "Let's move on" means a highly truncated selection of tasty tidbits of history, remembrance, and flavoring.

And what is our chef-in-chief preparing by way of a main course? Well, to be honest, we're not supposed to look too closely, leave that to his royal why-ness in the kitchen. In fact, a regular diet of platitudes chosen and oh-so carefully presented - he really is a master of innuendo seasoning and double-meaning - will ensure a lean, forward-thinking society.

Who wants to scour old recipe books like the Bible? The Koran is hip, growing, a force to be reckoned with; kosher is out. Judeo-Christian America? Pass. Didn't you know? America is one of the world's largest Muslim countries. Mmm, boy. That tastes great.

Let's face it. Myth just tastes better than gospel. Consider this first year a palate cleanser. Just you wait. Why before you know it, America will be feeding on a cuisine that will make you never look back. Yep.